friday: confessions and musings

These weeks have been flying by. I can't believe it's Friday already. I usually hit a slump on Wednesday and think the week will never end and then all of a sudden it's 6:30 pm, I'm putting away groceries and realizing that soon it will be Thursday and the week is nearly over. And here we are, Friday.

I'm linking up as usual for Confessional Friday with Leslie & Random Musings with Shana so won't you join me? Snag their buttons and then link up on their blogs and join the fun!

• I have a very short commute to work. When I say short I don't mean like a half hour, I mean 5 minutes max and that's if I get stuck behind a slow driver. It used to be a bit longer when a traffic light was involved but I figured out an alternate route to avoid this stop light issue. I've noticed in the past few weeks that in the morning I usually have just enough time to listen to ONE song on my way into work. Most of the time I don't complete this song on my drive but I've noticed that certain songs tend to dictate my mood that morning. I use my ipod since most of our radio stations here completely suck. Some mornings while I'm flipping through the ipod on shuffle what seems like 20 times before getting to a song I like or want to hear, I usually get stuck listening to nothing inspiring and feel a bit moody walking into the door. Days like today though, all is right in the world and the first song my ipod plays is "Where is My Mind" by the Pixies. I turn up the volume and float to work singing along and it will guide me through the day in a great mood. Other mornings I might settle on something a bit heavier and often feel more aggressive when I get into the door. I always try to remind myself that I have better days if I play something happy. I'm working on this. In that respect, anything by Mother Love Bone makes me mushy, happy and calm. 

• I got my hair cut yesterday. It's the classic thing that women go through where I wanted it shorter, but not THAT short. To be fair my hair dresser wasn't scissor happy she actually cut it as I wanted. I actually thought it would be a bit longer when she showed me the first cut, but it's not. I wasn't in full on cry mode but I just don't feel like me. Let's just say my hair was down past my bra strap when I got it cut, now it's just below my shoulders. It's a huge transition. One I'm not sure I'm ready for. Well what is done is done, I will rock it and do the best I can. Besides I reminded myself there are women, and children and men out there who don't have hair, can't grow hair and would love to have what I have. And in the end, it will grow back! It's just shocking to go from a super long ponytail, to one that's barely 3 inches long. I hate that I dye my hair because I might have gone shorter if I could donate it to Locks of Love or another charity.

• Hair isn't usually a big deal to me, but I've been sort of hiding behind it for a while now. Since I've gained weight I sort of liked that my hair covered my "back fat" - today while getting dressed I got a reality check. Guess it's the kick in the pants I needed, or at least I hope it is.

• We are hanging with my youngest brother-in-law this weekend. Mike's parents are heading to CT for his cousin's wedding. I hate that we couldn't go but with our budget we just couldn't afford to go, and go home to visit my father this summer. We plan to go camping and do some grilling this weekend. Mike's youngest brother is really into food, and cooking, and learning about cooking/grilling so for us it's a win/win because we love all of those things. Having him here for the weekend reminds me that we really need to work on a guest room. He is really only the fourth person to visit and stay with us since I moved here about 8 years ago, but still. Everytime it does happen we either offer up OUR bed, or the couch. Most people take the couch but it still makes me feel like a horrible hostess, especially when it's my girlfriends. We have the spare mattress, and the bed frame we just need to invest in a new box spring... you know something that doesn't hit the "NEED" column of our spending.

• I know I've discussed getting a handle on my finances etc on here, but have I discussed my WANT VS. NEED plan? I've been trying my best to not spend any unneeded extra money. We are saving  up for our trip to visit his sister this winter and that is where the bulk of our extra spending money will go. Then next year it will ALL go toward the greater good of getting out of debt. Add to that every other red cent I earn this year is going towards paying off debt. If something is not a serious "NEED" I will not spend my money on it. This includes clothing. I don't NEED anything. Now if I got a hole in my best pair of jeans, and didn't have a back-up pair then yes I will purchase some new jeans, but I will not go purchase a new pair just because I want them. I had a heart to heart with myself at American Eagle last weekend when they had some great "boyfriend" jeans on sale. They are my favorite but I talked myself off the spending ledge and reminded myself I didn't NEED them, I simply wanted them. All our money is currently going to bills, food, gas and that's about it. It's a new way of living for us but we've lived in excess for so long it's time to pay the piper and get back to basics. It's oddly enough a freeing feeling. I've never been trendy, but I did make a lot of purchases in the past that just really didn't do much for me. Items I wore once, used once and then never touched again. Things that didn't enrich my life as much as I thought they would or items I had to have that instant or I thought I might "die". None have added up to the expectations I had for them. This helps me to remember and be mindful of my spending.  It's sort of nice to let go of materialistic means and remember that the most important things in life, aren't things. Not preaching here, just reminding myself that I won't die if I don't get the latest new purse or perfume or go hog wild with all THE SHOPS items at Target (which in retrospect after seeing the collections was a ton of hype for nothing truly impressive, in my opinion). I'm sure when I'm debt free... I'll go on a rewarding spending spree, but hopefully I will be a bit more wise about my purchases! And not repeat the cycle. What I mostly want out of all this is money to travel, to see things and to have fun experiences, not collect more crap to hoard in my home. I've started to feel that experiences, stories and photos of these times are more valuable to me than most items I have "collected" in my home. No worries I'm not going off the grid... promise!

Time to step into the confessional booth... GUILTY PLEASURES!

I really wish I had a confessional booth, it was always my favorite part in Real World and I guess most of the reality shows of today.

Speaking of Reality Shows I have a new guilty pleasure in the form of reality TV it's Southern Nights. I may have talked about this, I can't remember but I know I mentioned it to Leslie because she too is obsessed with the show.  Basically the show is a spin off from the only "dating" show I will watch, Sweet Home Alabama. (I refuse to watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette) The cast offs, and former contestants are living together in an amazing home in Savannah, GA.  Clearly like most reality dating shows, it doesn't seem like finding true love stuck for the first contestant Devon (front and center on the couch below with blonde hair). She is on this show, "dating" a guy back home and chasing a former flame from her time in the Sweet Home Alabama Bachelorette chair. (He's the dude next to her in the picture who crawls in her bed every night). Bottom line this girl is a player, but she pretends she's the victim, sweet and innocent. I've heard rumors saying quite the opposite that she's not the sweet angel she plays on TV or at least wasn't while attending the University of Alabama. Yeah, I got connections and know the dirt, ya'll!

Courtney, Tristan, Cody, Tex, Flex, Cassie, Jersey, Kristina, Collin & Devin
(Tex, Flex and Jersey clearly aren't their real names but I don't care enough to figure out what they are)
Southern Nights on CMT Cast • via google

This is a HORRIBLE photoshop job on this promotional poster but, it fits with the cheese of the show. All these kids do is drink, party, and sleep - the producers have of course added in the drama and romance for us so we won't get bored. Yes, I watch this, all the time. They are a bunch of 20 something city and country kids mixed together in the house. It's like Real World, only CMT-ed up. And I'm living vicariously through them because years ago I seriously considered sending in a video to MTV to try out for the Real World. It was a dream of mine. Aim high girl.

I'm so into this show I DVR it. Mike can't stand it and often jokes that I need to stop watching these shows with sassy Southern girls because I'm starting to become a sassy Southern girl. Which makes me giggle because let's face it, I am SO not. Especially since my favorite cast members are from Kansas and Orange County (Cassie and Kristina aka O.Clicious), and Courtney is the Country girl I most like. I also love and my favorite dude on the show is hands down Cody. He's a real cowboy, rodeo man and has the best "southern-isms" to describe any situation. My favorite thing he says is, "It's fixin' to get ranchy!" Which I assume means "raunchy, dirty, messed up".  He's dating Tristan on the show. They were both former members of Sweet Home Alabama casts, but have known each other for years and lived near each other. They are the cutest couple ever, but I sort hate that we can't see his "wild side" since she keeps him on a short leash. But he's a doll.

Does anyone else other than Leslie and I give into this shows siren song?

So there you have it musings and my confessions of the week! I hope you all have a great weekend!!!