romper room

Summer is upon us here in the South. There is no denying this - between the crazy thunder storms complete with tornado warnings/watches/ZOMGs (that ones for you my dear, Aura ox) and the muggy after effects its time to sweat and be miserable. Well, at least most of the time. I've always loved Summer. It will never take the place of Spring or Fall in my heart but Summer was always a great time. It meant no school (until I entered college), trips to the beach and longer days and warm nights to hang out under the stars. Yes, I know all great things, indeed. Summer also often means time to show more skin. This isn't something I've been excited about in the past few years but this post isn't about my own personal body issues, instead I wanted to talk about the latest fashion craze...

The Romper.

via google • huge puffy hearts for SMG and Blake oxox

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate this trend at all. I think these are absolutely adorable and they remind me of outfits my mother used to wear when I was younger. My mom was super stylish and always on the cutting edge of fashion, hair and nails, it was her job to be that hip but I think she also had a passion for it. And I'd never knock Blake or Sarah Michelle (are you kidding, I have a girl crush to the max on SMG). But I just know in my heart of hearts this outfit is NOT for me.

I'm sure I wore these as a child, thanks to my trendy mother. And I'm sure much like the overalls that I wore, this get up drove me nuts. Overalls were the shizz when I was in middle school. I don't know who made them so popular, maybe it was Debbie Gibson, or NKOTB, maybe it was Kid n' Play (I know for a fact Kid n' Play made the one strap connected and the other loose a hip thing - and yes, I rocked it). Seriously, I'm pretty sure every time I wore overalls to school and thought "Girl you look cute!", I later used my new found freedom of cussing when away from my parents and put it to good use. Here's why...

First off there is absolutely NO classy way to go to the bathroom in a romper, jump suit or overalls. You literally have to undress, completely in the romper's case, in a bathroom stall, and hold the top part up as you hover over the can and try not to sprinkle on your gear, your body, your shoes or the seat - no thanks. Secondly, trying to get to this point of pee satisfaction would be a bitch if you really had to go, and it would be extremely annoying and hard. Imagine doing the pee pee dance (or worse the doo doo shuffle, don't stop get it, get it) while trying to get to the bathroom... then you're stuck trying to unbotton your top, or untie it or god forbid there is a zipper in the back, all before blowing your perspective load! YIKES!

Yes, I'm talking about #1 and #2 again - this is what you guys love, so don't even try to front like you don't. (One bit tid bit - I would NEVER wear these when I had my monthly 'pal', I can't even begin to IMAGINE trying to change a tampon all while doing the above listed... fuggetaboutit).

I had the same issue with all the fly gear they were passing off as hot fashion when I was in my early 20's and going out dancing every night. You remember the denim jump suits. Yeah, sure J-Lo looked tight in hers, but again - can you imagine being three sheets to the wind and trying to get out of that gear and hold it up, all the while swaying to the music or to avoid pissing on yourself? Girl, I used to out for 25 cent draft night at a country bar on Wednesdays, those were the days. Do you really think after a tray of 25 cent drafts I'd be in any shape to attempt this? No way, no thanks.

So I'm sure you're asking yourself... "Seriously Kelly? Do you gauge your clothing and fashion style on the bathroom all the time?" Quite frankly, yes. I do. Especially if it's gear I'm wearing out for a night on the town with friends.  Well that and it has to look good on me. You won't catch me trying to rock a half top because I hate my stomach, you also won't catch me trying to wear crazy high heels I can't walk in. If they don't pass the walk test I don't care HOW amazing they look, if I can't walk in them they are of no use to me. Besides, if I can't walk to the bathroom I can't RUN to the bathroom, duh!

So what do you ladies think - for practical reasons are Rompers a DO or a DON'T?  

I'm going with a huge DON'T for me. Like I said - they are SO cute, and how easy is that - one thing and you're dressed. No pants to match with a shirt or vice versa, but still it's one piece. I just don't see them being an option for me unless I can go somewhere and not have to pee for many hours, or I'm having a house party and I could care less about the issue because my potty is clean. 

Maybe I'm just traumatized, have you ever had your overall buckle/loop fall into a toilet full of pee? And had to wear said overalls for the rest of the day? No? Well then you can't understand my pain. 

Thank God piss is sterile.